The Crittenton Blog

No fairy tale

In last year’s sleeper hit movie “Juno,” just out in video stores, the teenage and pregnant heroine escapes her fate relatively unscathed. Her parents are understanding and supportive; she decides that she doesn’t want her boyfriend’s support. Facing relatively little judgment from her community, she returns to school and gives up her baby right after birth, with fairly little grief. In the end, she’s back dating the baby’s father and the world looks bright. Cue the lights.

I had just one thought after seeing Juno: nice fairy tale.

Counter to the images in the movie the reactions to the alleged pregnancy pact in Gloucester, MA show us that social attitudes have not changed nearly as much as Juno depicts. Moral judgments about teen pregnancy focus on the young mother. While the blatant underlying “boys will be boys” and “sowing wild oats” attitude is made clear by the absence of vocal criticism about the young men who are the fathers. Certainly, we want them to stick around and be good fathers, but the responsibility for getting pregnant always seems to rest on the shoulders of young women. A sad but true and a clear indication that sexism is alive and well.

Across the country right now many teenagers are pregnant or parenting young children. For many young women, pregnancy is a symptom of deeply ingrained issues and trauma that mask root causes like poverty, racism and sexism.

Many have experienced serious issues in their lives before they became pregnant–sexual, physical, emotional abuse; neglect; substance abuse; domestic violence. Many are themselves children of teen mothers and they face additional serious issues once they become pregnant. Most are abandoned bythe fathers of their babies, boyfriends, partners and family, and contrary tothe depiction in Juno, many of them choose to parent their own children.

Those who seek an adoptive family for their child struggle with the decision before, during and after, and they do not find adoptive parents in the “Penny Saver.”

Despite the barriers they face, many young mothers and their children have healthy relationships, strong bonds and go on to succeed and excel personally and professionally. In many cases, mothers and children remain together, and for others adoption is the right choice for both.

Many things have changed since the days when young women were hidden away (though in many places it’s still necessary). In the past, adoption was a decision often made by the young mother’s family or social service agencies, often against her will. For most of our history a hallmark of Crittenton agencies was to keep mothers and their children together, even if it went against the social norms of the time. This being said, we do recognize that there was a period of time during which Crittenton agencies, like many others, reacted to local and national values, expectations and pressure, resulting in the separation of too many mothers and children through “forced” adoptions.

Today we know that no matter what decision a pregnant young mother makes it must be her own, even if the result of her decision does not include a Hollywood ending.

In recognition of the efforts of parents, children and family members searching for each other, I’m proud to report that The National Crittenton Foundation has launched “Crittenton Connections” on our website. We hope that the ability to post information or search the database is of help to the many parents and children who were once connected to the Crittenton family of agencies and who continue to search for each other.

Jeannette Pai-Espinosa, President–The National Crittenton Foundation

Published Tuesday, July 15, 2008 10:37 PM by admin

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Jason said:

I really enjoyed that movie. I didn’t really think about it at the time but your right. It wasn’t very realistic.

July 25, 2008 4:28 PM

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